Hangovers
When a drunk has a terrific hangover because he drank heavily yesterday, he cannot live well today.
But there is another kind of hangover which we all experience whether we are drinking or not. That is the emotional hangover, the direct result of yesterday's and sometimes today's excesses of negative emotion -- anger, fear, jealousy, and the like.
If we would live serenely today and tomorrow, we certainly need to eliminate these hangovers.
Twelve Steps and Twelve Traditions, p. 88
Thought to Ponder . . .
Serenity is not the absence of conflict, but the ability to cope with it.
AA-related 'Alconym' . . .
N U T S = Not Using The Steps.
Wednesday, July 26, 2006
Wednesday, July 05, 2006
Daily Reflection for 7/5/06... "A NEW DIRECTION"
Our human resources, as marshalled by the will, were not sufficient; they failed utterly. . . Every day is a day when we must carry the vision of God's will into all our activities.
ALCOHOLICS ANONYMOUS, p.45,85
I hear talk of the "weak-willed" alcoholic, but I am one of the strongest-willed people on earth! I now know that my incredible strength of will is not enough to save my life. My problem is not one of "weakness," but rather of direction. When I, without falsely diminishing myself, accept my honest limitations and turn to God's guidance, my worst faults become my greatest assets. My strong will, rightly directed, keeps me working until the promises of the program become my daily reality.
**********
I love the promises, although when I was just getting out of drug rehab I had no idea how they could ever come true. I was reminded of exactly how this morning, when I ran into a good friend's fiancee outside the coffee shop. It turns out that my friend has kept to himself the fact that he's had a 7-year old daughter living in another country (the Netherlands). Perhaps this was a reason that he'd relapsed so many times, over & over again. The mother of the girl & the daughter have actually come to visit both of these friends of mine, and while they were really shaken up & nervous at first, they now see it as an opportunity to address a situation that had previously gone ignored & neglected. What a great chance he has! Incredibly, my friend has taken it really well, and they're working through the issues that have caused so much pain for so many years. A new direction indeed!
If you want to learn more about where I went to Drug Rehab, just follow the link. If you've come to visit because of a painkiller addiction and want a new sort of treatment for drug detox, follow that link instead.
ALCOHOLICS ANONYMOUS, p.45,85
I hear talk of the "weak-willed" alcoholic, but I am one of the strongest-willed people on earth! I now know that my incredible strength of will is not enough to save my life. My problem is not one of "weakness," but rather of direction. When I, without falsely diminishing myself, accept my honest limitations and turn to God's guidance, my worst faults become my greatest assets. My strong will, rightly directed, keeps me working until the promises of the program become my daily reality.
**********
I love the promises, although when I was just getting out of drug rehab I had no idea how they could ever come true. I was reminded of exactly how this morning, when I ran into a good friend's fiancee outside the coffee shop. It turns out that my friend has kept to himself the fact that he's had a 7-year old daughter living in another country (the Netherlands). Perhaps this was a reason that he'd relapsed so many times, over & over again. The mother of the girl & the daughter have actually come to visit both of these friends of mine, and while they were really shaken up & nervous at first, they now see it as an opportunity to address a situation that had previously gone ignored & neglected. What a great chance he has! Incredibly, my friend has taken it really well, and they're working through the issues that have caused so much pain for so many years. A new direction indeed!
If you want to learn more about where I went to Drug Rehab, just follow the link. If you've come to visit because of a painkiller addiction and want a new sort of treatment for drug detox, follow that link instead.
Friday, June 30, 2006
Daily Reflection for 6/30/06 "SACRIFICE = UNITY = SURVIVAL "
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The unity, the effectiveness, and even the survival of A. A. will always depend upon our continued willingness to give up some of our personal ambitions and desires for the common safety and welfare. Just as sacrifice means survival for the individual alcoholic, so does sacrifice means unity and survival for the group and for A. A.'s entire Fellowship.
AS BILL SEES IT, p. 220
I have learned that I must sacrifice some of my personality traits for the good of A. A. and, as a result, I have been rewarded with many gifts. False pride can be inflated through prestige but, by living Tradition Six, I receive the gift of humility instead. Cooperation without affiliation is often deceiving. If I remain unrelated to outside interest, I am free to keep A. A. autonomous. Then the Fellowship will be here, healthy and strong for generations to come.
Sunday, June 25, 2006
Daily Reflection for 6/25/06
A TWO-WAY STREET
If we ask, God will certainly forgive our derelictions. But in no case does He render us white as snow and keep us that way without our cooperation.
TWELVE STEPS AND TWELVE TRADITIONS, p. 65
When I prayed, I used to omit a lot of things for which I needed to be forgiven. I thought that if I didn't mention those things to God, He would never know about them. I did not know that if I had just forgiven myself for some of my past deeds, God would forgive me also. I was always taught to prepare for the journey through life, never realizing until I came to A.A. when I honestly became willing to be taught forgiveness and forgiving that life itself is the journey. The journey of life is a very happy one, as long as I am willing to accept change and responsibility.
Thursday, June 01, 2006
Daily Reflection for 6/1/06 "Serenity"
I came back to my little apartment in Saigon,
ready to return to my medical work.
I was so beaten because I'd been driving and searching
and clenching my fists for almost three years. . .
I came into my apartment and suddenly collapsed on the floor.
I was breathing kind of heavily and said to myself,
"Oh, to hell with serenity, I don't care if it ever comes."
And I meant it.
And do you know what happened?
All of a sudden the craving to find serenity
utterly evaporated -- and in its place was serenity.
The trouble was the search . . . looking out there
for what was right here.
October 1995 interview with Dr. Earle M., author of "Physician, Heal Thyself"
The Best of the Grapevine [Vol. 3], p. 142
ready to return to my medical work.
I was so beaten because I'd been driving and searching
and clenching my fists for almost three years. . .
I came into my apartment and suddenly collapsed on the floor.
I was breathing kind of heavily and said to myself,
"Oh, to hell with serenity, I don't care if it ever comes."
And I meant it.
And do you know what happened?
All of a sudden the craving to find serenity
utterly evaporated -- and in its place was serenity.
The trouble was the search . . . looking out there
for what was right here.
October 1995 interview with Dr. Earle M., author of "Physician, Heal Thyself"
The Best of the Grapevine [Vol. 3], p. 142
Friday, April 28, 2006
Daily Reflection for 4/28/06: "No Cop-outs!"
We have to stay sober no matter how life treats us, no matter whether nonalcoholics appreciate our sobriety or not.
We have to keep our sobriety independent of anything else, not entangled with any people, and not hedged in by any possible cop-outs or conditions.
Over and over, we have found we cannot stay sober long just for the sake of wife, husband, children, lover,parents, other relative, or friend, nor for the sake of a job, nor to please a boss (or doctor or judge or creditor) -- not for anyone other than ourselves.
Living Sober, p. 64
Having a slip is not an option.
Staying sober is the solution.
We have to keep our sobriety independent of anything else, not entangled with any people, and not hedged in by any possible cop-outs or conditions.
Over and over, we have found we cannot stay sober long just for the sake of wife, husband, children, lover,parents, other relative, or friend, nor for the sake of a job, nor to please a boss (or doctor or judge or creditor) -- not for anyone other than ourselves.
Living Sober, p. 64
Thought to Ponder . . .
Having a slip is not an option.
Staying sober is the solution.
Wednesday, April 26, 2006
Daily Reflection for 4/26/06 "Making Constant Efforts..."
"...to Excercise Our Choice"
This is the state [meditation] of being which so often discovers and deepens a conscious contact with God.
As Bill Sees It Page 108
Monday, April 10, 2006
Daily Reflection for 4/10/2006 "Striving to Achieve..."
"Striving to Achieve The Best We Can."
It has taught me that success and failure are never final, and that neither count for very much in the final assessment of any man who has done his best.
Page 525 / Third Edition
My best is all I can do. There are no regrets, no attachments to expectations, no emotional turmoil when I know that I did my best. Whether it's making amends or simply taking contrary action to maintain a positive day-to-day lifestyle, I know that I've done well if I can say that I did my best. Even if I fail, I will always try for progress. Doing my best to make progress, therefore, is my highest honor in sobriety, and brings me endless joy on a constant basis!
It has taught me that success and failure are never final, and that neither count for very much in the final assessment of any man who has done his best.
Page 525 / Third Edition
My best is all I can do. There are no regrets, no attachments to expectations, no emotional turmoil when I know that I did my best. Whether it's making amends or simply taking contrary action to maintain a positive day-to-day lifestyle, I know that I've done well if I can say that I did my best. Even if I fail, I will always try for progress. Doing my best to make progress, therefore, is my highest honor in sobriety, and brings me endless joy on a constant basis!
Sunday, April 09, 2006
Daily Reflection for 4/9/06 "Growing Up..."
GROWING UP
The essence of all growth is a willingness to change for the better and then an unremitting willingness to shoulder whatever responsibility this entails.
AS BILL SEES IT, p. 115
Sometimes when I've become willing to do what I should have been doing all along, I want praise and recognition. I don't realize that the more I'm willing to act differently, the more exciting my life is. The more I am willing to help others, the more rewards I receive. That's what practicing the principles means to me. Fun and benefits for me are in the willingness to do the actions, not to get immediate results. Being a little kinder, a little slower to anger, a little more loving makes my life better--day by day.
--This post was courtesy of J.J. from Recovery Universe. Keep up the great work, J.J.!
The essence of all growth is a willingness to change for the better and then an unremitting willingness to shoulder whatever responsibility this entails.
AS BILL SEES IT, p. 115
Sometimes when I've become willing to do what I should have been doing all along, I want praise and recognition. I don't realize that the more I'm willing to act differently, the more exciting my life is. The more I am willing to help others, the more rewards I receive. That's what practicing the principles means to me. Fun and benefits for me are in the willingness to do the actions, not to get immediate results. Being a little kinder, a little slower to anger, a little more loving makes my life better--day by day.
--This post was courtesy of J.J. from Recovery Universe. Keep up the great work, J.J.!
Wednesday, April 05, 2006
Daily Reflection for 4/5/06 -- "Continually Working..."
"Continually Working At Letting It Go."
It is a spiritual axiom that every time we are disturbed, no matter what the cause, there is something wrong with us. If somebody hurts us and we are sore, we are in the wrong also. We have found that justified anger ought to be left to those better qualified to handle it."
--12 and 12, Page 90
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It is a spiritual axiom that every time we are disturbed, no matter what the cause, there is something wrong with us. If somebody hurts us and we are sore, we are in the wrong also. We have found that justified anger ought to be left to those better qualified to handle it."
--12 and 12, Page 90
********************************************
Monday, April 03, 2006
Daily Reflection for 4/3/2006
Much the Same as Like Reinvesting..."
Gratitude should go forward rather than backward. In other words, if you carry the message to still others, you will be making the best possible repayment for the help given you.
As Bill Sees It / Page 29
**************
I was recently in touch with some newcomers who were having some really difficult times. In an effort to offer some sound guidance, I relied upon the knowledge that Gratitude is always a phenomenal remedy for emotional turmoil & difficult times. I suggested that the newbies take a moment, learn the difference between "gratitude" & "thankfulness" (as my sponsor made me), and then write down on paper 5 different things for which they're grateful. I asked them to call me back once they were done.
I felt wonderful knowing that these newcomers to sobriety would soon feel the relief and warmth that I felt when I first began doing gratitude lists. I was happy that my God was able to give me the tools to offer others in need, just as I had been given the tools when I was in need.
However, neither of the newcomers called back. No kidding. But I'm still sober & free. If they do call me again we'll do the same thing over, and expect a different result. And there lies the question: how can something so illogical & so amazing, daresay "insane" (drunks staying sober) actually take place? In the case of a newcomer who finally does get it, we did it over and over again until we did get a different result! We did so because we have faith and we've seen it before. Amazing how that paradox of "insanity" works in the program. Quite beautiful, indeed, and I wouldn't have it any other way.
Gratitude should go forward rather than backward. In other words, if you carry the message to still others, you will be making the best possible repayment for the help given you.
As Bill Sees It / Page 29
**************
I was recently in touch with some newcomers who were having some really difficult times. In an effort to offer some sound guidance, I relied upon the knowledge that Gratitude is always a phenomenal remedy for emotional turmoil & difficult times. I suggested that the newbies take a moment, learn the difference between "gratitude" & "thankfulness" (as my sponsor made me), and then write down on paper 5 different things for which they're grateful. I asked them to call me back once they were done.
I felt wonderful knowing that these newcomers to sobriety would soon feel the relief and warmth that I felt when I first began doing gratitude lists. I was happy that my God was able to give me the tools to offer others in need, just as I had been given the tools when I was in need.
However, neither of the newcomers called back. No kidding. But I'm still sober & free. If they do call me again we'll do the same thing over, and expect a different result. And there lies the question: how can something so illogical & so amazing, daresay "insane" (drunks staying sober) actually take place? In the case of a newcomer who finally does get it, we did it over and over again until we did get a different result! We did so because we have faith and we've seen it before. Amazing how that paradox of "insanity" works in the program. Quite beautiful, indeed, and I wouldn't have it any other way.
Tuesday, January 31, 2006
Daily Reflection for 1/31/06 "Working at Staying..."
"...The Course."
We have come to believe He would like us to keep our heads in the clouds with Him, but that our feet ought to be firmly planted on earth. That is where our fellow travelers are, and that is where our work must be done.
Page 130
We have come to believe He would like us to keep our heads in the clouds with Him, but that our feet ought to be firmly planted on earth. That is where our fellow travelers are, and that is where our work must be done.
Page 130
Thursday, January 12, 2006
Daily Reflection for 1/12/06 "Grateful for All Who..."
"...Grateful For All Who Have Come Before Me."
Almost none of us liked the self-searching, the leveling of our pride, the confession of shortcomings which the process required for its successful consummation. But we saw that it really worked in others, and we had come to believe in the hopelessness and the futility of life as we had been living it.
Page 25
Wednesday, January 11, 2006
Daily Reflection for 1/11/06 "...I Spoke Of You..."
"...Shame on Me!"
Gossip barbed with our anger, a polite form of murder by character assassination, has its satisfactions for us, too. Here we are not trying to help those we criticize; we are trying to proclaim our own rightousness.
12 and 12 / Page 67
Gossip barbed with our anger, a polite form of murder by character assassination, has its satisfactions for us, too. Here we are not trying to help those we criticize; we are trying to proclaim our own rightousness.
12 and 12 / Page 67
Tuesday, January 10, 2006
Daily Reflection for 1/10/06... "...A Good Hard Look..."
"...At Our Priorities."
So the difference between "the boys and the men" is the difference between striving for a self-determined objective and for the perfect objective which is that of God.
12 and 12 / Page 68
I feel like this is the difference between having selfish motives and self-less motives. It's interesting that alcoholism & addiction of all things has given me a reason to be "selfless" (although I'm far from good at it).
I recall several stories of people who were under large amounts of stress, or going through extremely tough times with a breakup, a death in the family, or some other tragedy. They were told to be "of service", and came back after that period of hardship and talked about how being of service was so powerful and so meaningful for them. This same principle of being "outwardly" focused and action-oriented is the key to selfless behavior for many eastern spiritual traditions as well. I like it.
Be of service and help others so that your thoughts will not be so self-centered. It's impossible to be thinking about yourself while you're thinking about others. So be "of service" and you will necessarily feel better. What a beautiful lesson!
So the difference between "the boys and the men" is the difference between striving for a self-determined objective and for the perfect objective which is that of God.
12 and 12 / Page 68
I feel like this is the difference between having selfish motives and self-less motives. It's interesting that alcoholism & addiction of all things has given me a reason to be "selfless" (although I'm far from good at it).
I recall several stories of people who were under large amounts of stress, or going through extremely tough times with a breakup, a death in the family, or some other tragedy. They were told to be "of service", and came back after that period of hardship and talked about how being of service was so powerful and so meaningful for them. This same principle of being "outwardly" focused and action-oriented is the key to selfless behavior for many eastern spiritual traditions as well. I like it.
Be of service and help others so that your thoughts will not be so self-centered. It's impossible to be thinking about yourself while you're thinking about others. So be "of service" and you will necessarily feel better. What a beautiful lesson!
Wednesday, January 04, 2006
Daily Reflection for 1/4/06 "...Prayer..."
"...and Meditation"
Our thought-life will be placed on a much higher plane when our thinking is cleared of wrong motives.
Page 86
The purpose is to have a clear and positive state of mind. Are there any negative or harmful intentions in that? Is there anything to debate here? The fact of the matter is that I've alwasy felt better after prayer or after a meeting. I've never met anyone who didn't feel better after prayer or a meeting. It's beautiful knowing that there is an answer, isn't it?
Our thought-life will be placed on a much higher plane when our thinking is cleared of wrong motives.
Page 86
The purpose is to have a clear and positive state of mind. Are there any negative or harmful intentions in that? Is there anything to debate here? The fact of the matter is that I've alwasy felt better after prayer or after a meeting. I've never met anyone who didn't feel better after prayer or a meeting. It's beautiful knowing that there is an answer, isn't it?
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